Sunday, February 21, 2010

The "looking great" factor

I've had a lot of visitors this week at home, and all of them tell me how great I'm looking. I was having a hard time with this as I never saw myself all tubed up, tied down, and nearly comatose. So All I could think was that I looked like crap with my hair all crazy, my walk that takes two minutes to leave a room, and the constant need to use the bathroom (thank you Lasisk).
So when I saw pictures of me laying on a bed with a tube in every available orifice, and read my charts about my heart nearly exploding, being coded and doped up for weeks just to keep me alive, I started to understand.

I'm lucky to be alive.

Somehow, I fought against leukemia in my sleep, now I fight against it in my waking hours with exercise and diet. Diet meaning eating whatever I can. Nonstop. Exercise means lifting two pound weights over my head, and lots of walking. I fight on and I'm just trying to stay healthy until the time comes for stem-cell transfusion (Bone Marrow Transfusion).
So all those people who tell me I look good or great, I get it now, and I thank you for your patience. I'm still working on getting better, be I'm not nearly satisfied with my progress yet.

5 comments:

  1. If you need a holistic nutritionist, drop me an e-mail...

    Keep your chin up hon, it's a long process coming back from the dead -- took me 16 months. You can do it, as I know there are few in the world as tough or stubborn as you.

    Always - d.

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  2. Eat when you want, exercise when you can, and rest when you need to. You are a strong and beautiful person Mark - and you will beat this. As Winston Churchill said, "If your going through hell, keep going..."

    Sending you lots of love and healing thoughts from the East Coast. Esther

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  3. Who can deny, who can deny, it's not just a change in style?
    One step done and another begun and I wonder how many miles.
    I spent a little time on the mountain, I spent a little time on the hill.
    Things went down we don't understand, but I think in time we will.
    Now, I don't know but I was told in the heat of the sun a man died of cold.
    Keep on coming or stand and wait, with the sun so dark and the hour so late.
    You can't overlook the lack, jack, of any other highway to ride.
    It's got no signs or dividing lines and very few rules to guide.

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  4. Pat and Barb KerriganFebruary 21, 2010 at 10:12 PM

    Hi Mark, We are still praying for you, Like I have said in the past, One day at a time, You will get there I know in my heart you will. Look who is at your side helping you, My Wonderful Daughter, She is the best Nurse for you . Remember "Laugh alot" that helps so much ! Love you Mark. Sending you good wishes from Michigan ! Love, Pat & Barb Kerrigan

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  5. Mark . . . Don't be hard on yourself regarding your progress for you truly have gotten very far with your fight . . . you are alive, at home and back with your dog, and aware of what you have been through and what you need to do to get stronger. As Leslie's Mom stated in her comment you need to take it one day at a time. You are doing great with the fight and blessed with family and friends that are praying for you. Keep strong and keep the faith.

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