Sunday, February 21, 2010

The "looking great" factor

I've had a lot of visitors this week at home, and all of them tell me how great I'm looking. I was having a hard time with this as I never saw myself all tubed up, tied down, and nearly comatose. So All I could think was that I looked like crap with my hair all crazy, my walk that takes two minutes to leave a room, and the constant need to use the bathroom (thank you Lasisk).
So when I saw pictures of me laying on a bed with a tube in every available orifice, and read my charts about my heart nearly exploding, being coded and doped up for weeks just to keep me alive, I started to understand.

I'm lucky to be alive.

Somehow, I fought against leukemia in my sleep, now I fight against it in my waking hours with exercise and diet. Diet meaning eating whatever I can. Nonstop. Exercise means lifting two pound weights over my head, and lots of walking. I fight on and I'm just trying to stay healthy until the time comes for stem-cell transfusion (Bone Marrow Transfusion).
So all those people who tell me I look good or great, I get it now, and I thank you for your patience. I'm still working on getting better, be I'm not nearly satisfied with my progress yet.